Strangers


The “deep” stuff I probably shouldn’t post on here because it might scare some people away who are less in touch with their feelings…

“Our time apart, like knives in my heart…” -Nickelback

Thought to self:  If you didn’t deny (suppress, and repress) your feelings, you’d feel the same way…

I should probably just shut up before I push you away further, from your own feelings.  You’re – she’s “e strangulated.”

Have you ever loved or cared for someone who didn’t completely love themselves? … who’s life depended upon external validation, and who, when scared, would deny and suppress the very most sacred thing – one’s very essence?

I cannot make her feel… I cannot make her recognize herself.  I cannot make her see the beauty that she has inside.  I know on the outside she appears as though she has it all, but inside she thinks completely the opposite.  Why would she trust me when I hurt her?  Despite the fact that it was long ego, that doesn’t make any difference in her mind and heart.  The fact that I have changed does not register with her because she is still stuck in a world of suspended feelings.

I sit here, and I say, “I want to go back to that time,” only in present day, and if given the chance, I would… “When a voice from behind me…” -Nickelback

“That was fighting back tears…”  Nickelback.

I think that we all want to be happy.  She does not think that she can be happy with me.  Why?  Because I hurt her so very long ago… the biggest mistake of my life and the experience that changed me indefinitely.  And yet, she has not let go of this despite the fact that she will say otherwise, but “Actions speak louder than words” and “Talk is cheap,” and I can see what’s beneath the surface.

We run and hide because we’re scared, but you can’t continue to run away from love with out denying yourself the very essence of life, which leads me to say, “Are you who they want you to be,” or “Are you yourself?”  Who are you?  Do you run with those who don’t mirror you, those who invalidate you?  …those whose attention you want, who will never see the true “you?”  How long will you continue to run and hide?

I can’t be someone I’m not.  You move forward, yet you deny and pretend not to see the very thing that always saw through you.

“Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey

Just a small town girl
Livin’ in a lonely world
She took the midnight train goin’ anywhere

Just a city boy
Born and raised in south Detroit
He took the midnight train goin’ anywhere

A singer in a smoky room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on and on and on

Strangers waiting
Up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people
Living just to find emotion
Hiding somewhere in the night

Working hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin’ anything to roll the dice just one more time

Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on

Strangers waiting
Up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people
Living just to find emotion
Hiding somewhere in the night

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on to that feelin’
Streetlight people

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on
Streetlight people

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on to that feelin’
Streetlight people

And perhaps from my small perspective, it looks like this.  This guy could be me singing this:

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s